By: Harvey Miller, Red Rock Publishers
A leader announces a decision. Heads nod. Nobody objects. Three weeks later, the market disagrees and the board wants answers.
Dr. Vanessa Ervin calls this the Feedback Trap, and it is the subject of a chapter in her new book, Purpose Before Position. Her point: “Compliance had masqueraded as alignment.” She admits she has fallen into it herself. Authority, she argues, is not the same as voice. “Position forces people to obey; influence invites them to follow.”
Ervin, President and CEO of Carobell and a former hospital board chairman, identifies patterns that keep leaders from hearing the truth. Some read silence as agreement. Others tighten control to cover insecurity. Confident leaders fall in too, because certainty “can slam the door shut on correction.”
Her remedy is a weekly “Listening Loop,” a set time when the leader only listens, asking two questions: “What am I not seeing?” and “Where are we afraid to speak truth?” In meetings, she suggests asking what worries people that aren’t being named, what they would do differently with full authority, and who is being left out of the decision.
The chapter lists five focal points: suspend judgment during early feedback, make what you heard visible through a change, credit people publicly for speaking up, build structured dissent such as a “red team,” and keep a “What I Didn’t Hear” journal. The routine is summed up in four words: Pause. Ask. Listen. Change.
The book also offers an example from inside Carobell. A former human resources leader describes pushing too hard for a change at a board meeting. Ervin said nothing in the room. The next day, she told him, without judgment, that his job was to give the board information and the board’s job was to decide. He did not feel belittled or dismissed.
He also recalls that she nominated him for a community leadership program, accommodated his schedule as a single father, and backed his experiments whether or not they worked. After he left for a role with more money, the new job became little more than work. He returned more than nine years ago. “My job is not my purpose, it’s my position,” he writes.
For managers, the takeaways are concrete. Ervin recommends 30-minute one-on-ones built on two questions: what worries you most, and what would restore your confidence? She also lays out a 72-hour, 30-day, and 90-day plan for rebuilding communication after trust slips, including closing the loop by showing how feedback was used. She also advises a predictable cadence of communication, from daily huddles to monthly town halls, so reliability replaces rumor.
Her underlying argument is practical: teams that fear speaking up hide problems until they become expensive. “The leader who opens their ears widens their influence.”
Her book Purpose Before Position is available on Amazon.
